


Visitors

by Warp5Complex_Archivist



Category: Star Trek: Enterprise
Genre: F/M, Other Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-04-08
Updated: 2006-04-08
Packaged: 2018-08-16 00:06:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8079151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Warp5Complex_Archivist/pseuds/Warp5Complex_Archivist
Summary: The Enterprise gets a few interesting visitors thanks to the ever-helpful Daniels. Multiple pairings. (09/09/2003)





	

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Kylie Lee, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Warp 5 Complex](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Warp_5_Complex), the software of which ceased to be maintained and created a security hazard. To make future maintenance and archive growth easier, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in August 2016. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but I may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Warp 5 Complex collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/Warp5Complex).

  
Author's notes: Beta: Leah, T'Lin, DNash, and Kyrdwyn have served up suggestions and/or corrections.  
  
Warning: Mary Sue. This fanfic is silly and should not be taken seriously. Doyle issued an anti-Mary Sue challenge at EntSTSlash to place yourself as realistically as possible onto Enterprise. I started to think it would be fun not to be my real life self but to be my alter ego, Kipli. But then I decided that it would be even way more fun if it wasn't just me. So, this fic includes special guest star appearances by: KylieLee, TheGrrrl, MJ, Kyrdwyn, Kalita, DNash, Cinmbria, Moppig, Kageygirl, T'Lin, Helyn Highwater, Gigi Sinclair, Leah, and Squeaky. :)  


* * *

"Where's KylieLee?" Archer called out, scanning the overcrowded Bridge.

"She left with Kipli and Ensign Mayweather a few moments ago," T'Pol informed him.

"And you didn't stop them?" Archer demanded, frazzled at having to keep track of so many sudden guests.

"I believed the ensign could handle walking two women to their guest quarters in Cargo Bay Two, sir. Shall I send security after them?"

Was she being sarcastic? Archer frowned and then shook his head. "No, you're right. Travis can deal with those two just fine. It's Malcolm that's going to need an armed escort around ship."

"Indeed." T'Pol nodded, then returned to her previous conversation with T'Lin. It seemed to be quite the discussion and Archer left them to it.

Archer glanced over at Malcolm Reed standing at Tactical surrounded by more than half a dozen women. Reed was definitely working on a short fuse at the moment dealing with them.

After a nonstop barrage of 'suggestions' for his romantic life, Reed finally snapped, "Do you women expect me to be sleeping with the whole goddamn ship?!"

"No, just the men!" Leah called out. A round of cackles followed.

"Good lord," Reed groaned.

"You _could_ pick a steady boyfriend and most of us would be happy," Kalita suggested.

"Like Trip," Kageygirl pointed out, gesturing at Tucker standing protectively close by at his Engineering station. "He's a very popular choice, and he's so good with his hands."

"And mouth, and tongue, and—"

"TheGrrrl! Don't scare them!" DNash interrupted.

"No, that's my job," Cinmbria said with a smirk.

"What my evil twin means," MJ cut in, "is there's no reason why you should go with the most popular man. Jonathan Archer—"

"The Captain?" Reed squeaked.

"I thought _I_ was destined for the Cap'n," Tucker spoke up, sounding both sarcastic and confused at the same time.

"You aren't already with him?" Gigi Sinclair asked. "I mean, after eight years of being 'friends', you'd think you two would move on to bigger and better things together..." Gigi winked.

"Amen," Helyn Highwater agreed. "Malcolm can be with Travis. Kipli will be happy."

"Don't count Malcolm out. Jonathan would cherish Malcolm. He deserves some adoration." Kyrdwyn stuck up for her "wife" MJ's suggestion. Archer still wasn't clear on that whole situation.

"Listen," Moppig said. "We can solve this problem easily with just one simple word. Threesome."

There was a round of nods as all three men gaped.

"W-what?" Reed stammered.

"What about Travis?" Leah asked. "We can't leave him in the lurch."

"Rostov?" DNash suggested.

Leah shook her head quickly. "No way; Rostov belongs with Ensign Ian Young."

"Fine, make it a foursome," Moppig amended.

Tucker huffed, "You can't be serious."

"They could all fit in Jonathan's bed...probably." TheGrrrl looked up as she calculated positions in her head.

"Lets not scare Porthos," Kyrdwyn said.

"Like he hasn't seen it before," Cinmbria countered.

This had gone on long enough. Next they'll start pairing up poor Porthos with one of Phlox's animals. "All right, you gals have had your fun." Archer stepped around in-between Tucker and Reed, earning unintentional giggles and a few "oh aren't they so cute together" from some of the women. "Why don't we break up and get you all down into your makeshift guest quarters."

"Will any of you men be _going down_ with us?" Kageygirl asked, managing a straight face. Cinmbria and DNash beside her stifled another round of giggles.

Archer sighed and ignored the play on words. "I can escort half of you there; T'Pol will take the rest of you."

There was a general round of grumbling and whining for Malcolm and/or Trip to be escorts. Archer glanced over at T'Pol with her own admirer T'Lin. T'Pol was doing an admirable job listening politely to T'Lin's suggestions. Perhaps she seemed a little too interested...Then they both glanced over their shoulders at the Communications station. Archer shifted his attention to Hoshi and Squeaky huddled in deep discussion across the Bridge. He frowned just slightly. What were they talking about?

"Hoshi," Archer called. The two women turned to him. "Still no sign of Daniels?"

"Oh, no, sir, not since he left. He's not on ship and there are no other vessels nearby." Hoshi noted the other women being broken up into two groups. "You're sending them to guest quarters? Does Squeaky have to leave, sir?"

"Don't worry." Squeaky stood. "We'll talk more later. Say hi to Liz for me." Squeaky grinned happily and joined the rest of the women.

"Okay, this half, you're with me." Archer restrained a sigh at the gleeful look on MJ and Kyrdwyn's faces, following him quickly to the lift, along with Leah, Cinmbria, Helyn Highwater, and Kageygirl.

It was a very tight fit in the lift but he wasn't about to break them up any more than he already had. The women were impossible to keep track of as it was. And had someone just touched his ass? He looked around accusingly but everyone wore perfect, innocent looks. Culprit still at large, Archer practically dove out the lift door when they reached their deck. He kept a meter ahead of the pack behind him, but he could still feel eyes watching his backside as he walked.

Archer nodded to the security officer posted outside Cargo Bay Two and stepped inside. Supplies had been shoved to one side and hammocks set up for the sudden guests. As they walked into the bay, Archer could hear Mayweather speaking with KylieLee and Kipli.

"You know," Mayweather said seriously, "I never really thought of it like that. I should be doing more around here. I hardly get to do anything. I don't even get to pilot the shuttlepod on most away missions. And for some strange reason, Malcolm has been avoiding me. I don't know why. I really should ask him."

"See. You definitely need to start paying more attention to everything. We'd love to see you _doing_ more." Kipli winked over at KylieLee at the double meaning.

"And you and the captain—" KylieLee started.

"What about the captain?" Archer interrupted as he came up to the three.

"Sir." Mayweather jumped up onto his feet. "We were just, um, talking. I'll get back to my post now, sir."

"Isn't he so cute?" KylieLee whispered to Kipli, who grinned in agreement.

Archer wondered if they were actually trying to pair him up with the young ensign, then nodded to Travis, who fled quickly but not without flashing a smile at the two women.

"Captain, what's your stance on fraternization with subordinates?" KylieLee asked bluntly.

"I, uh," Archer stalled. He'd never really thought about it before. "I have no immediate problem with it."

KylieLee nodded knowingly and seemed to plot something away in her head. Lord help him.

"How long will you...slashers be here?" Archer asked.

"Oh, not long," Kipli answered. "Daniels should be picking us up within a day or two. He doesn't want us doing _too_ much damage."

Like start painting the ship pink and putting up matching curtains for the viewscreen?

The second batch of women arrived following T'Pol. They seemed to brighten at seeing him still there. A number of them collected and made a dash for him, so he hastily said a goodbye to Kipli and KylieLee and strode for the exit.

Before he could flee, Archer was interrupted by T'Pol at the door, T'Lin and Squeaky at her side. "Sir, I believe it is reasonable to remove the guard at the door and allow our guests a more free range of the ship. They do not seem threatening."

Archer recalled the ass grab on the lift but kept that tidbit to himself. They weren't menacingly threatening, no. "Agreed, T'Pol. You can dismiss the security officer and I will inform Malcolm of the change. I'm heading back to the Bridge."

"Yes, sir. If you do not mind, I would like to...give T'Lin and Squeaky a tour of the ship."

They say Vulcans don't lie but Archer never put much faith in rumors. He eyed T'Lin and Squeaky. "A tour?"

"A personal tour," T'Lin answer, straight faced. She lived up to her Vulcan name.

Archer raised his eyebrows but stopped a smart remark. "I suppose Hoshi would like to join you three too?"

"She did express interest," T'Pol answered.

Archer chuckled softly and shook his head. "I'll send her down. You girls have fun."

Squeaky beamed. "We will!"

Finally, Archer managed to escape. Throughout the day he'd been pointed at relationships with Trip and Malcolm, or both of them, along with Travis and...He sighed as he pressed for the lift. And Phlox. He couldn't even imagine what being romantically involved with their good doctor would actually be like. Yet, oddly, all of the suggestions had a ring of truth and struck a chord inside Archer. No matter how off the wall, their convictions that the pairing could work made him look twice at the man mentioned. His lips curled up into a small smile as he stepped onto the empty lift.

"Always keep an open mind..."


End file.
